It can be confusing and heartbreaking to watch someone you love become emotionally invested in a relationship that may be fraudulent. Beyond using sophisticated technology such as AI-generated images and deepfake video calls, today’s cybercriminals manipulate victims over weeks and months through hundreds of carefully crafted interactions designed to build trust and discourage outside intervention.
Recognizing early warning signs can help you offer support with empathy and understanding to your loved one. Let’s look at some warning signs you should
Emotional Life Changes
Major life transitions can increase vulnerability to romance scams. Cybercriminals comb through social media and dating sites, looking for people who have recently experienced:
- Grief or loss
- Divorce or separation
- Illness or retirement
- Loneliness or isolation
If your loved one has recently experienced any of these life changes, they may be seeking companionship online. What begins as a seemingly genuine connection can quickly develop into a strong emotional bond with someone who appears attentive and understanding—but is actually a cybercriminal.
As their loved one, it’s important to remember that vulnerability is not a weakness. Romance scams are carefully designed to manipulate trust and emotions.
A Relationship That Moves Quickly
Cybercriminals purposefully create relationships that feel intense and “too perfect” early on.
Warning signs might include:
- A sudden online relationship that becomes serious very quickly
- Declarations of love within days or weeks
- Constant texting or calling
- Talking about being soulmates or destiny
- Making future plans like marriage or starting a life together before meeting in person
Even if your loved one has video chatted with the person, it does not guarantee they are real. Cybercriminals can use the latest AI technology to manipulate videos in real time.
Increased Isolation
Cybercriminals often try to isolate victims from family and friends because loved ones are more likely to spot red flags and question the relationship.
You may notice your loved one:
- Withdrawing from you, other loved ones, or activities they used to enjoy
- Becoming defensive or making comments like “you don’t understand” when asked about the relationship
- Keeping conversations secret
Isolation helps the cybercriminal maintain control and reduces the chances someone is able to intervene.
Constant Phone Usage
Romance scammers often maintain nonstop communication to build emotional dependency.
Pay close attention to your loved one’s phone habits, including:
- Messaging at all hours
- Having anxiety tied to their phone notifications
- Displaying secretive behavior with their device
- Having a loss of interest in offline activities
Financial Requests
If your loved one’s online partner requests money, they’re likely involved in a romance scam. Requests for money often begin small and increase over time. Many cybercriminals reuse similar stories and tactics to ask for money, including:
- The Emergency Story: Claiming they need help with medical bills, travel costs, custom fees or other sudden crisis.
- The Crypto Investment Scam: Encouraging your loved one to invest in cryptocurrency or fake trading platforms promising large returns or exclusive opportunities.
- The Overseas Worker or Military Persona: Claiming to work overseas on an oil rig, or in the military to explain why they can’t meet in person.
- The Celebrity Impersonator: Impersonating celebrities or public figures using fake accounts and AI generated content.
Other Warning Signs
- Suddenly unable to pay their bills
- Unexplained withdrawals or loans
- Receiving packages or unknowingly moving money (money mule)
Next Steps
Recognizing the warning signs of a romance scam is an important first step, but how you respond matters even more.
Your loved one may be emotionally attached to the scammer, and direct confrontation can sometimes push them further away. Approaching with empathy, patience, and curiosity can help keep communication open and make it easier for them to seek support.
Click here to access the next blog in this series and learn how to approach your loved one once you’ve recognized these romance scam warning signs.